Thursday, February 12, 2009
The last couple of months have been a bit rough for me. The winter months usually are difficult. I have to remember when I feel down that it is temporary. I have felt frustrated and impatient with my boys. I have been feeling pretty down about myself. I could go on and on, but let's just say I've been blue.
Today, as I was reading books with Gavin, I realized I didn't feel that frustration and that sadness and that I haven't for a couple of weeks. I wanted to know what it was that made the difference. I don't remember a particular event. It is just gone and I can feel the difference.
I know the beautiful weather we have been having has certainly helped that happy feeling!
Gavin and I read a book from the library called Always by Ann Stott. It is starts out with a picture of a little boy and it reads "Do you love me?" "Do you love me when I get dressed all by myself? Do you love me when I'm gentle? Do you love me when I'm not?" The book continues in a similar pattern. It brought me to tears. The little boy reminds me of Gavin.
I thought about the last couple of months and all the frustration and impatience I have felt with them. I wish I could take back the times I was impatient and frustrated with them. I can't and I am sure that I will continue to have time where I feel that way.
But, oh how I love them. I love them even when they don't get dressed by themselves. I love them when they share with each other. I love them when they jump off the furniture. I love them when they give me hugs and kisses as I go out the door. I love them when they make messes. I love them when they clean up their messes. I love them when they throw tantrums. I love them when they hold my hand and tell me they love me. I love them when they spill blueberries on my chair. I love them when they tell stories. I love them when they use their imagination. I love them when they get up at 5:00 Am. I love them when they get up at 8:00 AM. I love them when they take naps. I love them, always.
I hope that I remember every day why I love them, so I am going to post everyday during these cold winter months why I love them.